In Every Woman

I-VAWA

2010-08-05T06:04:00.000-07:00

In reading about the International Violence Against Women Act on VDay.org, I found a pleasant surprise. I saw the name of someone I know right there in the text, and luckily I was proud to see them. (Excerpt from VDay.org)

V-Day joins Amnesty International USA, Women Thrive Worldwide and Family Violence Prevention Fund in strong support of the International Violence Against Women Act (I-VAWA). This is the first comprehensive piece of legislation in the United States aimed at ending violence against women and girls around the world and would consistently incorporate solutions for reducing violence against women into U.S. foreign assistance.

Specifically, I-VAWA would:
**Address violence against women and girls comprehensively, by supporting health, legal, economic, social, and humanitarian assistance sectors and incorporating violence prevention and response best practices into such programs.
**Alleviate poverty and increase the cost effectiveness of foreign assistance by investing in women.
**Define a clear mandate for Senior Officials in the Department of State and USAID for leadership, accountability and coordination in preventing and responding to violence against women and girls.
**Enable the U.S. government to develop a faster and more efficient response to violence against women in humanitarian emergencies and conflict-related situations.
**Build the effectiveness of overseas non-governmental organizations – particularly women’s non-governmental organizations – in addressing violence against women.

In February 2010, I-VAWA was re-introduced in the 111th Congress by bipartisan teams in the House and the Senate on February 4th, 2010. In the House, the bill was introduced by Representative Bill Delahunt (D-MA), Chair of the House Foreign Affairs Sub-Committee on Europe and Representative Ted Poe (R-TX), Co-chair of the Congressional Victims’ Rights Caucus. In the Senate, it was introduced by Senator John Kerry (D-MA), Chair of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee and Senators Boxer (D-CA), Collins (R-ME) and Snowe (R-ME).

I am proud to see that my representative (and member of my church) is a part of something so large and so worthwhile.

There are several ways to take action:
Sign the petition: www.womenthrive.org/vday
Organize a call-in or letter writing campaign. Get your friends and relatives to flood the voicemail or mailbox of your member of Congress. Urge them to cosponsor the bill and support it when it comes to the floor. Is your member of Congress already an I-VAWA cosponsor? Click here to see an up to date list of cosponsors. If your member of Congress is a cosponsor write and thank them for the support.
Download Sample 'Please Co-Sponsor' Letter >
Download Sample 'Thank You' Letter >

Texans, let's show Ted our appreciation and flood his mailbox with these thank you letters!

A new project from Lorri Acott-Fowler!

2010-04-21T06:24:00.000-07:00

(This is an excerpt from an email I received this morning. Though space is indeed limited, I'm certain Lorri would LOVE an influx of choices!)

Are you interested in particpating in a really cool art project? Here it is:

The Big picture: Six Words

Love

Joy

Peace

Grief

Anger

Fear

6 large boards, each with 100 nails.

Your part: choose any or all of the 6 words. For each word you choose find or create an object that represents that emotion for you (no greater than 3"x3") .

It can be anything as long as it is permanent and you don't need it back.
Then write a statement (100 words or less) about each object and why it represents that emotion.

Send it to me with your email address and name included. A release will be sent to you once I get your stuff and I'll need you to send it back to me.

Space is limited, so don't wait too long or you will miss out. Venue will be announced when one is finalized.

Lorri Acott-Fowler

1036 S Taft Hill Rd

Ft Collins, Co 80521

The International Princess Project

2010-03-18T07:57:00.000-07:00

The Vision of International Princess Project: Restore hope and dignity to women formerly enslaved in prostitution.

The Mission of International Princess Project: Establish self-sustaining enterprises in partnership with indigenous organizations that provide for physical, emotional and spiritual needs of women formerly enslaved in prostitution; AND advocate for women enslaved in prostitution around the world.

This amazing project, started by Shannon Keith in 2005, has made an immeasurable impact on many, many lives. These woman have been brought out of slavery and prostitution and given new purpose and dignity. Keith's actions continue to affect these women and their children.

And you can help. Of all the charitable work asked of you, this may be the most fun: Buy and wear adorable pajamas!

The proceeds go directly to India to help feed and shelter these women and their families, as well as fund the programs that pull women from destitution. This blog entry on their site explains a little about the Red Light District, where many of these women are rescued.
These women handmake beautiful pajamas and sell them internationally. They are beautiful, and they are made with purpose and determination. What better gift to give to someone? They are apparently also very comfortable!

Please check out their store to see the wonderful selection, and to read about their mission: Punjammies

(Thanks to The Pioneer Woman for posting about these today)

Protecting Ourselves

2010-03-01T09:14:00.000-08:00

Have you ever wandered over to My Very Worst Date.com for a good laugh? The scenarios are often cringe-worthy, but most of the time you get a good chuckle as well. They had a contest for Valentine's Day where people submitted horrors to win Worst Date In America. Ever since V-Day, they have been running the Finalists.

As you can imagine, these are some of the most brutal, embarrassing and/or scary dates fathomable. I know when I read them I often feel sorry for the innocent bystander who gets lied to/manipulated/humiliated, or all of the above. But there are several that make me nervous for the attitude and behaviour of women in our society (and in myself): the need to appear polite.

Example: This woman's date went from normal to startling in a short time. She discovered, while out in public, that her date had a serious dose of the crazies. She was driving, and when she got him home he made a request:

"He asked me to come up and I really didn’t want to, but didn’t know how to say no. I thought I’d just go up for a bit to be polite and then I’d leave."

Soon after she went inside, he entered the room naked and holding a rifle. Now, luckily this woman's story ends with her safely getting home, and a more appropriate sense of What Not To DO on a date, but it would have been far too easy for her to end up on the news.

Another entry shows us a woman who finds her blind date to be much older than his profile pic (a common crime), in horrible shape and sporting a matted grey beard. He also starts off the date with more lies by having her meet him at an upscale restaurant, only to hop into her car and ask to go to House of Pies. She sees several red flags, and yet says this:

"Then he asked me for a ride home. I was curious, so when he asked me if I wanted to check out his comics collection I followed him inside."

I will not even type the things this man did - and that she allowed - other than to say she wound up... messy.

"Bewildered, I washed my hands and then showed myself the door, wondering if this crazy date had all really just happened."

For one final example, this woman went to her date's mansion on their second date, and had a bad feeling from the start thanks to an unnecessary display of candles:

"He had a couple of glasses of rosé wine already poured – I know, I know, red-alert, right? But I wasn’t thinking, because I was already nervous from the candles.
I didn’t like the taste of alcohol, so I only had a very few sips. Then I noticed that I was getting sleepier and sleepier, and had a horrifying moment of clarity: this guy had slipped me some roofies."

She makes this horrifying realization, and then goes with him on a tour of his giant house! He "kept finding excuses to keep me in the house" and "stalled, and stalled, and stalled" until, in order to show her a 'trick', he crossed to the opposite side of a very long room. This would have been a good moment to escape, if not sooner, but she plays along with his trick.

"After an hour of stalling, he went to the bathroom, and I ran out the front door, leaving my expensive heels behind."

An HOUR, ladies! She stayed and wandered and threw grapes and made small talk for well over an hour even though she KNEW he had slipped her drugs!

Even more upsetting, perhaps, is the comments section. Concerning the last "date", many people were proud of the woman, because she had "the sense to get out". Yes, that much is true I suppose, but if she had any sense, why did it take her an hour?!

Ladies, we have to protect ourselves, not only from lame or creepy dates, but from charming strangers. I'm sure we have all heard about woman being kidnapped in parking lots or out at social events because some charming guy made a simple request, and the women were too polite and/or too trusting. It scares me, because I have those qualities in full. I am often too trusting and polite, although I also have a healthy sense of panic.

Please remind your girlfriends, sisters, daughters, whoever to be careful in this world, that is so full of creepers.

Virtue on your lips

2010-02-15T08:07:00.000-08:00

What a neat idea.

I find, too often, that I have slander on my lips. Sometimes anger or malice. I need to spend more time with wisdom on my lips, and devotion.

The clever young women at What's Your Virtue are helping to make that possible. They have come up with a line of lip gloss that promotes self-awareness regarding what comes out of our mouths. Thanks to their products, I can literally have Kindness on my lips, and therefore on my mind.

A big shout-out to Chris at Just A Girl for the wonderful *giveaway* that alerted me to this great product!

Relief for Mauritanian Girls

2010-01-18T07:09:00.001-08:00

As of this morning, 30 Muslim leaders in Mauritania have publicly banned female circumcision.

This newsbite from the Associated Press gave me great hope for the slow battle of overcoming culturally self-inflicted torture:
"Cheikh Ould Zein, head of the Forum of Islamic Thought, says the scholars believe the Koran does not endorse cutting young girls' genitals to limit their sexual activity as women. He said Monday that the leaders also agreed to preach against the practice at their mosques."

I imagine a great sigh of relief passing over this West African country this morning, although I see a struggle in their future. Some people, even women, will fight to continue this horrific practice, and I pray that they one day realize the long term effects this has on all involved.

Words that don't need twisting to offend

2009-11-20T09:31:00.000-08:00

If Kate Moss spent any energy on what comes out of her mouth, instead of focusing on what does not go in, she might have avoided this media circus.

For those of you who may not be aware, there are sites all over the web dedicated to anorexia and bulimia; giving how-to tips, ways to hide it, and so on. These Pro-disorder websites feed off of quotes like the one recently thrown out by Kate Moss in an interview.

"Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels."

She refers to this as one of her many "personal motto's". A spokesperson for Beat, a charity focused on preventing eating disorders, pointed out that this quote can be found on the front page of "Starving for Control", a well-known pro-anorexia site.

I cannot stress enough how big of an issue eating disorders are for women of all ages, and there is especially a big fight against it in the UK right now. Please talk to the women in your life, especially those that are young and impressionable, and tell them their beauty is not measured in pounds or inches.

Signs of our Society's Decline

2009-06-25T08:44:00.000-07:00

It is ironic that I should feel moved to post this blog, because on my personal blog I posted one that felt near the opposite just a few hours ago.

A guilty pleasure of mine is to head over to Texts From Last Night online. Sometimes they are really funny, and they are often offensive, but sometimes they are entirely too tragic for me to understand why someone would willingly share these things. Although, I suppose the real concern is that they sent them to someone in the first place.

They give me an insight into the culture of our youth. Granted, I should not pretend that these messages represent all teenagers and young adults. In fact, these may only represent a small percentage of our population, but some of these are serious red flags, even if they only encompass a small demographic.

Case in point. This message was posted this morning:
(847): This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
(847): And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month

These are the values and priorities of our youth, at least the party-culture. And people always want to assume all young men are wanton trolls, but that young women have a higher standard of virtue... perhaps we should stop looking at it that way? From what I have heard and read, young women are becoming just as lustful and reckless as the stereotype of their counterparts.

And it is this recklessness that concerns, more than the lustful behavior. Yes, from a moral perspective, I am highly concerned about the sexual behavior and allowances of our youth. What I want to evaluate, though, is the complete lack of self-protection. Constantly putting drugs and alcohol into their bodies, sleeping with several different partners, choosing "lazy contraception" (Plan B, abortion, etc) over thinking ahead and preventing problems...

I know that one does not completely excuse or explain the other, but this seems to tie back exactly to the lack of sexual education in our country! Not the promiscuity, necessarily (though possibly), but certainly the recklessness.

We have got to do something! We need to be reading, voting, writing, SCREAMING at the top of our lungs!

The Best Use of Bribery - Hip-Hop for HIV tests

2009-06-22T07:01:00.000-07:00

This week in Houston, TX, the NAACP, along with Planned Parenthood and other foundations, are going to bribe young Houstonians into getting HIV and syphilis tests, as well as sexual health education.
And I am loving it!
Sure, I wish we didn't have to resort to bribery to get things done, but hey, I'm just ecstatic they are doing SOMETHING proactive, and probably very helpful!

HIV AWARENESS TESTING
•Who: Anyone 15 to 40 with photo identification (driver’s license or a state, military or school ID)
• What: Free HIV and syphilis rapid tests plus sessions on sexually transmitted disease prevention
• When: 7 a.m. to 10 p.m., Monday through Thursday
• Where: NAACP Family Technology Center, 4203 Fannin
Information: 713-794-9020
~*~

The goal — targeted to National HIV Testing Day on Saturday — is to screen 1,200 people daily from today through Thursday at the NAACP Family Technology Center and another 10,000 in the next two weeks at Planned Parenthood, St. Hope Foundation and other partner agencies.

~*~

Everyone who goes in to take these tests, as well as an hour of education, will receive tickets to a concert in the George R Brown Center, with a long list of performers. The entertainers include someone named Bun B (from Port Arthur) and LeToya Luckett, who apparently used to be in Destiny's Child... for that week that they had four members. Whatever, it is still a free concert!

I am so proud to be a Houstonian, because they are taking action against an epidemic of ignorance. There is simply too much information for people to know everything they need to for their own health, especially with declining (and sometimes non-existent) sex education. This seems to be a larger problem with the black youth of America, which is the most bitter irony, because they are much more likely, biologically, to adopt these diseases:

"African-Americans bear the heaviest burden of the nation’s HIV/AIDS crisis. The U.S. population is roughly 12 percent black, but African-Americans account for 46 percent of the 1 million people living with HIV nationwide, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reports.
"Those hit hardest in Houston are young and black, which is why the mass testing targets African-American youths."

People do not realize the staggering statistics that go along with these diseases, especially in areas with limited education:

"In 2008, 14 clinic patients tested HIV-positive. There have been three more this year. The youngest was 15; the oldest was 24. Before, an average year turned up five young adults with the virus."

Please, spread the word of this effort, so that we can protect our youth. Hopefully, this will seriously open the eyes and minds of many, urging them to better protect themselves and those they love.

You can read more about this event at The Chron.

Stand Up Girl

2009-05-28T09:16:00.000-07:00

StandUpGirl.com is an online community designed for women who are experiencing unexpected pregnancy. The topics range from preventing pregnancy, accepting responsibility, how to make a new plan, and even how to recover from an abortion. 'Becky' has developed a loving community where women and girls help each other and, hopefully, learn from each others' mistakes.

The writing has an endearing, youthful quality. It comes across as advice from your BFF at a sleepover, but with wisdom and a certain maturity. This somewhat relaxed demeanor is an odd advantage, and hopefully it helps Becky 'target' a younger audience.

There is such hope and encouragement on these pages. I love the forward of the "Making A New Plan" page:

"Your life has taken an unexpected turn and it is time to make a new plan! There are probably lots of things on your mind and perhaps it is hard to think clearly because you are afraid and feeling vulnerable. You are a mother and have a little one to take care of now.

The good news is, you can do it! Many other women have found themselves in your situation and have come out of it as stronger women and wonderful mothers. This is going to be a very difficult time for you and the next couple of years raising a toddler will not be easy either. However, if you work through your life a day at a time and make the most important things your priorities, you will not get as overwhelmed."

Her tone is so gentle and encouraging, but she manages not to pull any punches. She repeatedly says on her site that 'this will not be easy', but the community is there to help those who are scared and confused. Becky urges women to join local networks, specifically to look for pregnancy centers, saying "At first, the idea of dropping in was very intimating and I felt embarrassed that I needed help. Before long, I felt quite at home and was so grateful for all their help. "

From a Christian standpoint, I especially appreciate her suggested post-abortion Bible studies, one for women as well as one for men. It is so refreshing to find Christians whose outlook is modern and accepting. So often, in these situations, "the Church" comes across looking cold or unsympathetic. That was not Jesus' message, and I applaud Becky for her open arm policy.

This blog truly tries to cover everything. Under the Tab labeled "Girl Help", you will find links called "I'd Like to Help", a page of local and international help-lines, centers and programs; "Abortion Testimonials", where women and girls discuss their decision in an effort to prevent others; "Girl Power", "Dating, Love, Sex", "Crisis Support", "Biology and In Utero Info", and finally "Young Mother Help", which are all pages of appropriate links, leading readers to information across the web.

I am so thankful Becky's personal mission, and I pray that she continues to help women and girls as they make major life decisions.

...and then there's Bristol Palin...

2009-05-21T07:31:00.000-07:00

It is by happy accident that this article so appropriately follows my last post about Meghan McCain. Perhaps "happy accident" is the wrong way to put it, because I am far from happy about this article and picture:

Let me throw in a sidebar, before I burn this soapbox: how bad do you feel for Tripp Palin? Not just because if the STUPID name, which seems to be genetic, but let's take a look at his future. Technology is advancing every day, to accomplish amazing feats. Don't you figure that, say, the Internet will still be around when he is 10 or so? And don't you assume that the Internet will have held onto this nauseous propaganda, wherein Tripp's mommy practically paints the word "REGRET" across the baby's forehead and drags it behind her? Her entire campaign, specifically in this magazine interview, consists of complaining about the burden of a baby; the crying, the pain, the responsibility - wah, wah, WAH! The therapist that gets their hands on this child will be a millionaire...

OK, so about the article itself... I can barely see straight, I am so upset. The girl, this idiot child, seems to think she has discovered a secret. "OMG, I can haz consequences?" How can anyone, ANYONE, think that Abstinence Only "education" is acceptable? The ridiculous part, is that now she is an even bigger proponent for it! WHAT?!? So, if you could go back and change things, rather than use a condom or a pill, you would just sit next to each other and pray? I'm not trying to mock, because honestly that does work for a few very strong people, but let's not pretend that when Bristol Palin time travels, she suddenly has a brain. No, she would still be a horny, under-educated teenager, and she still would have had sex!

I agree that we need to teach our children to abstain from sex. I am also aware, however, of reality; since when did we start assuming teenagers listened? No one likes to be told what to do (or not do) but teens are the worst! Their bodies are telling them to do things, and adults are telling them not to. Let's take a guess about who wins, 8 times out of 10.

I know people that have abstained, who are saving themselves for marriage. I promise, a handful even, of wonderful, educated adults. Those people made that choice because of God's command, not a pathetic "sex ed" class or a political leader. That we continue to refer to Abstinence Only teachign as "education" is an abomination.

And Bristol? Pay less attention to the papparazzi, and more to your son. If you don't want to go in debt over his counseling...

Meghan McCain makes me proud to be a Republican

2009-05-08T10:40:00.000-07:00

Labels are a dangerous thing to wear and assign to others. We allow them to wholly define a person, and that is such a huge mistake. I am a Christian, and to some people that label includes the subtitle "Without Fault". Trust me when I tell you that is far from true. One day I will copy Maya Angelou's amazing poem When I Say I'm A Christian to further my point on that idea. But today's issue is about politcal labels.

Meghan McCain is a Republican, loud and proud. In the fitting-with-the-label category, she is pro-life. But she speaks out adamently against the common perception of the Republican party on the issue of abstinence-only sex education. Other than that fabulous jacket, this is my favorite of her qualities : )

In her column (The GOP Doesn't Understand Sex) she writes: "Let me get something straight: Bristol Palin, as an 18-year-old adult, is free to make her own choices and decide how she wants her life to unfold. But for whatever reasons, the American public and media remain overly engrossed in our politicians’ sex lives and, as in this case, those of their families. There’s an especially unhealthy attitude among conservatives. Daughters of Republican politicians aren’t expected to have sex, let alone enjoy it—as if there were some strange chastity belt automatically attached to us female offspring. God forbid anyone talk realistically about life experiences and natural, sexual instincts. Nope, the answer is always abstinence."

This young woman has a strong sense of self and of justice. She wants to deal with our youth honestly; what a novel concept! "The key, honestly, is communication between parents and children. At the end of the day, the worst thing parents can do is raise children who are not prepared for the situations they may encounter, especially when they’re not planned... Unfortunately, Republicans typically don’t like to discuss or deal with things they think are wrong or immoral. And that’s a huge mistake. If we can’t discuss birth control in addition to abstinence, and in a nonjudgmental way, kids will continue to make bad choices for lack of having access to informed, safe options. Not everyone shares the same beliefs, and more importantly, people don’t always react the same way to their circumstances. Which is why it is so important to encourage honest, open communication about the realities of sex within the party at large, and more specifically, between parents and their children."

Meghan is an impressive young woman, and I look forward to hearing her impact on the Republican party.

Lauren Luke

2009-04-29T09:29:00.001-07:00

I have found a new blog to follow that really challenges me. I often agree with the sentiment, but I just as frequently disagree with the delivery. ZeldaLily subtitles itself as "Feminism in a Bra". Do with that what you will, but hop on over and see if her articles can challenge you and your beliefs on these issues.

ZL posted a blog yesterday concerning Lauren Luke, the YouTube make-up entrepreneur. I don't get to spend much time on YouTube, thanks to a web-block at work, but this seems like a truly fascinating gal.

Her story of learning and teaching make-up is inspiring, and she loved being able to "[make] a connection with other girls out there like me, regular girls." She loves the ingenuity and personality of this creative expression we wear on our skin. "I always dreamed of having my own makeup line where I could develop products that made people feel special - that I myself would be over the moon to wear. The excitement that comes from makeup is something very personal."

She has recently developed her own line, which currently consist of 'kits' (how very British of her) based on a color scheme or evoked feeling. Check out her amazing kits and videos on her new site, By Lauren Luke.

Forming an Opinion

2009-04-16T11:14:00.000-07:00

It is one of the trickiest topics to discuss, especially among women, without getting agitated. How one woman can think that something is perfectly acceptable while another believes it to be evil and vile makes this a conversation to be entered at your own risk. You can even find two women who are both "on the same side" whose beliefs are vastly different.

Where is the line drawn between birth control and abortion? When and why should abortion be allowed?

Extreme stories like this one can really sway your opinions, although I agree with one commenter; this really makes up my mind about sexual education more than the abortion issue per say.

This article has moments that are graphic; consider yourself warned.
http://zeldalily.com/index.php/2009/04/teens-using-cow-hormones-to-induce-abortion/#more-210

The French push harder to protect their own and others

2009-04-15T08:13:00.000-07:00

"PARIS – France's government launched a campaign Tuesday against forced marriages and genital mutilation, seeking to protect women from practices that quietly thrive in immigrant communities the nation is struggling to integrate."

France has long been fighting the weary battle against genital mutilation, especially on it's own soil. Many immigrant groups who have planted themselves in France have brought cultures and traditions that the French government will not allow.

Now the battle wages even stronger as they as trying to stamp out forced marriages as well. These laws extend to French citizens on foreign soil as well.

I'm sure you can understand and appreciate how this battle is nearly impossible to win. The current strategy is to inform all people in the public service that they must join the fight.

"The government is handing out 100,000 leaflets to schools, doctors and other public services explaining the health and legal risks and providing information on support services for victims.
The campaign involves two stark, red, white and black brochures. One pictures a razor — a tool often used in genital mutilation — in a circle with a slash through it. The other shows a splayed palm, a ring of barbed wire being slid over the ring finger, also circled with a slash running through it."

Please pray for our French sisters as they march slowly towards a victory. They need our support, emotionally and financially, as well as spiritually.

Afghan women on both sides of the stones

2009-04-15T08:03:00.000-07:00

As things move farther from the Taliban-style of ruling, women are gaining small ground all the time in Afghanistan. This does not mean, however, that things are always moving forward. Sometimes you fall back.

A new marriage law has passed in Afghanistan that has many women upset. A crowd in Kabul protested this law, where they were pelted with small stones and gravel. The most troubling part of this news, for me personally, was that there were women throwing the stones as well.

The new law states that "a husband can demand sex with his wife every four days unless she is ill or would be harmed by intercourse — a clause that critics say legalizes marital rape. It also regulates when and for what reasons a wife may leave her home alone."

A crowd of female Afghan police circled the women to protect them from the stones. I would really like to know the political opinions of those women! Did they protect their sisters because they agreed, or simply because it was their job? Would some have preferred to move aside and watch the women suffer?

A crowd of men and women were there to assault the protestors, shouting such things as, "You are a dog! You are not a Shiite woman!"

One beautiful piece of news in this story gives me great hope for the women of this nation. Fourteen-year-old Masuma Hasani said her whole family had come out to protest the law — both her parents and her younger sister who she held by the arm. "I am concerned about my future with this law," she said. "We want our rights. We don't want women to just be used."

Something must be going right if the youth are really evaluating their own politcal future as a result of actions now. They are becoming more and more educated about consequences of actions; their own as well as their governments', and frankly ours.

Sex Survey: Communication Between Mothers and Daughters

2009-04-15T06:53:00.000-07:00

O Magazine worked together with Seventeen Magazine on a survey of mothers and daughters, to determine how effective the existing communication is between them. They also hoped to discover what changes can be made to better inform both parties. This survey covers both general information and statistics as well as very specific stories from women's' lives.

It shows the facts - sometimes disturbing, sometimes relieving - about what girls gain from these Talks with their mothers, as well as what is lost. The beautiful part of this article is that it is (loosely speaking) and instruction manual. As these women pour out their souls, and their experiences, you really get a feel for what works and what doesn't. Every woman (and every girl) are going to want and need completely different things (which is why men will never truly "understand women"), and this helps to show the balance of what works for whom.

"Every mother of an adolescent goes through a wrenching push-and-pull as she tries to both protect and let go of a child she loves beyond measure. How a mother knows when to trust this young creature to make the right decisions as she shares her body with another—that comes down to instinct, not numbers. But what our survey can, and does, assure us is that talking about sex with our daughters—no matter how awkward or embarrassing, no matter if we're met with utter adolescent disdain—is worth the effort. "

This article is informative, funny and slightly heartbreaking, but I would definitely call it helpful. Share this with your daughters and mothers, your sisters and friends.

Safety Tips

2009-03-02T07:49:00.000-08:00

There have been so many kidnappings and attacks, especially locally that I hvae heard of, and I cannot help but post things like this. I hope it helps:

Crucial
Because of recent abductions In daylight hours, refresh yourself of these things to do in an emergency situation... This is for you, and for you to share with your wife, your children, everyone you know. After reading these 9 crucial tips, forward them to someone you care about. It never hurts to be careful in this crazy world we live in.

1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do : The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do!

2.. Learned this from a tourist guide. If a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you... Chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you, and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!

3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car, kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy.. The driver won't see you, but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their chequebook, or making a list, etc. DON'T DO THIS!) The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR , LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE.. If someone is in the car with a gun to your head DO NOT DRIVE OFF, Repeat: DO NOT DRIVE OFF! Instead gun the engine and speed into anything, wrecking the car. Your Air Bag will save you. If the person is in the back seat they will get the worst of it . As soon as the car crashes bail out and run. It is better than having them find your body in a remote location.

5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage:
A.) Be aware: look around you, look into your car, at the passenger side floor , and in the back seat
B.) If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.
C..) Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and the passenger side... If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot. This is especially true at NIGHT!)

7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; and even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN, Preferably in a zig -zag pattern!

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked 'for help' into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.

9. Another Safety Point: Someone just told me that her friend heard a crying baby on her porch the night before last, and she called the police because it was late and she thought it was weird.. The police told her 'Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.' The lady then said that it sounded like the baby had crawled near a window, and she was worried that it would crawl to the street and get run over. The policeman said, 'We already have a unit on the way, whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.' He told her that they think a serial killer has a baby's cry recorded and uses it to coax women out of their homes thinking that someone dropped off a baby. He said they have not verified it, but have had several calls by women saying that they hear baby's cries outside their doors when they're home alone at night.

10. Water scam! If you wake up in the middleof the night to hear all your taps outside running or what you think is aburst pipe, DO NOT GO OUT TO INVESTIGATE! These people turn on all your outside taps full ball so that you will go out to investigate and then attack.

Stay alert, keep safe, and look out for your neighbors! Please pass this on This e-mail should probably be taken seriously because the Crying Baby Theory was mentioned on America 's Most Wanted when they profiled the serial killer in Louisiana

TURNING PAIN TO POWER Tour

2009-01-15T07:03:00.000-08:00

Join V-Day for the TURNING PAIN TO POWER Tour & Stand Up for the Women of Congo!
"V-Day’s TURNING PAIN TO POWER Tour was developed to get the word out about violence against women in the Congo, and the efforts underway to end it. Through public conversations, Dr. Mukwege and Eve will expose the violence, explore the causes of the brutality, and share the stories of Congo’s growing movement of women leaders. The February 2009 tour will make stops in New York City, Los Angeles, San Francisco, Atlanta, and Washington, DC. "

To find the itinerary and to buy tickets, please follow this link:
http://newsite.vday.org/pain-to-power-tour

Rock 'n' Roll Camp for Girls (Raining Jane)

2008-10-24T13:42:00.001-07:00

If you do not already know and love the band Raining Jane, I suggest you stumble over to my HoneysuckleBlossom blog to discover their talents.

For those of you who are familiar with their music, did you know that these women are also out to improve the world for young girls? Yeah, I thought that might interest you (or else you would not be reading this blog).

In August 2001 a summer program was developed on the Portland State University campus. This was called the Rock 'n' Roll Camp for Girls (RnRC4G). To understand how incredible this program is, check out their mission statement:

The Rock’n’Roll Camp for Girls, a 501(c)3 non-profit, builds girls self-esteem through music creation and performance.
Providing workshops and technical training, we create leadership opportunities, cultivate a supportive community of peers and mentors, and encourage social change and the development of life skills.

This amazing program has grown and developed with the help of many amazing people throughout the past seven years. The volunteers, teachers, musicians, and the community in general have established a place for young women to learn, not only music, but a safe and creative way to express and understand themselves.

In the summer of 2007, Raining Jane volunteered to teach and inspire these young women in Portland. I thank them for their contribution to this wonderful program, and even more so for introducing me to it. I am proud to spread the word about any course or group dedicated to improving the lives of young women.

The Girl Effect

2008-10-15T07:42:00.000-07:00

Check out this amazing video at http://www.girleffect.org/

If you want to end poverty and help the developing world, the best thing you can do is invest time, energy, and funding into adolescent girls. It's called the Girl Effect, because girls are uniquely capable of investing in their communities and making the world better. But here are 10 things that stand in their way:

*Let's see some ID. Without a birthcertificate or an ID, a girl in the developing world doesn't know and can't prover her age, protect herself from child marriage, open a bank account, vote, or eventually get a job. That makes it hard to save the world.

*Illiteracy does not look good on a resume... 70% of the world's out-of-school children are girls. Girls deserve better. They deserve quality education and the safe environments and support that allow them to get to school on time and stay there through adolescence.

*...and pregnancy doesn't look good on a little girl. Child marriages are the norm in many cultures where women's bodies aren't considered their own property. Pregnancy is the leading cause of death for girls 15-18 years old. Girls have a right to be able to protect their health and their bodies.

*The face of HIV is increasingly young and female. When girls are educated about HIV, they stand a better chance of protecting themselves. but education is not enough. Girls need to be empowered and supported to make their own choices.

*A nice place to work would be nice. If girls have the skills for safe and decnet work, if they understand their rights, if they are financially literate and considered for nontraditional jobs at an appropriate age, if they get their fair share of training and internships, they will be armed and ready for economic independence.

*The check is in the mail but it's going to your brother. Only one-half of one cent of every aid dollar spent in the developing world is earmarked for girls. And yet when a girl has resources, she will reinvest them in her community at a much higher rate than a boy would. If the goal is health, wealth, and stability for all, a girl is the best investment.

*Adolescent girls aren't just "future women". They're girls. they deserve their own category. They need to be a distinct group when we talk about aid, education, sports, civic participation, health and economics. Yes, they are future mothers. But they actually live in the present.

*Laws were made to be enforced. Girls need advocates to write, speak up, lobby, and work to enforce good laws and change discriminatory policies.

*She should be a statistic. We won't know how to help girls until we know what's going on with them. Hey, all you governments and NGOs and social scientists: You're accountable! We need an annual girl report card for every country so we can keep track of which girls are thriving and which girls are not.

*Everyone gets on board or we're all overboard. Boys, girls, moms, dads. If we don't all rally to support girls, nothing is going to change. Not for them, and not for us. Change starts with you. So get going.

Ladies, we have got to do something! Please, PLEASE spread word about this amazing program. Send the link for the Girl Effect to every one you know. Talk to your daughters and sisters about what YOU can do.

Little Vitories

2008-10-15T07:17:00.000-07:00

The community of Kapchorwa in Uganda has decided to outlaw female circumcision within their society!

Perhaps the most inspirational moment in this article was that "the campaign to end the practice has been alive in his community for several years, and that in the recent past, educated young women in Kapchorwa have shunned it."

The power of information and education should never be underestimated. I am proud to be an educated woman, and I want to celebrate my sisters in their accomplishment.

Dear Friends

2008-10-13T08:00:00.000-07:00

I have neglected this forum, and I am truly sorry. I seek to focus more on these blogs and articles in the future. Right now I am throwing some ideas around:
*I want to write about Sarah Palin, as she is a woman in the spotlight, but I am not sure how to go forward with the blog: what do I say? Do I discuss her political leanings? Do I only highlight the good, but ignore the bad? I cannot do that, and so I must take much more time to figure out her blog.
*I think I will write a few in the near future focusing on the amazing women in my personal life. Many show amazing strength every day, and they deserve highlighting as much as anyone else.
*My good friend Kelly is a history teacher, and she has a passion for women's history and women's rights that make me feel completely ignorant! I want her to visit and blog about some famous (and some practically unheard of) women in history who have paved the way for us.

If you would like to suggest someone (preferably with a specific example of why they deserve mention, and/or a link) please feel free to comment.

Kiera Knightley's stand

2008-07-29T12:48:00.000-07:00

One of my first articles for this blog was on Keira Knightley; her dedication to her body and her placement as a role model. She is a beautiful and an impressive woman. She has recently earned even more respect from me.

Publicity photos for her upcoming film The Duchess are being released, but the editors want to digitally enlarge Ms. Knightley's breasts in the posters. Newspapers have reported that "movie bosses wanted the slender actress to appear more curvaceous, but 'she has insisted that her figure stay in its natural state. She is proud of her body and doesn’t want it altered.'" I am impressed that Keira would take this stand, partially because it is not truly that big of a deal and she will not let it slip. She is standing up against the stereotype of beauty, which shifts frequently and violently.

The actress was digitally altered in the advertisements for King Arthur in 2004.

Controversial Argument

2008-07-09T07:08:00.000-07:00

Note: In many situations, if I had to admit it, I would consider myself conservative. I believe that people should live with the consequences of their actions. More than that, I believe that as a society we should work to prevent those actions which will require necessary consequences. But even having said all of that, even being pro-life (if I had choose one or the other), I still do not agree wholeheartedly with this law. Make no mistake, I personally feel that is a step in the painfully appropriate direction, but there is a long way to go.

In South Dakota they have passed a law concerning the necessity for informed consent in abortion. Starting now, in order for a woman to obtain an abortion in South Dakota she, and her doctor, must signed a written statement that states (among other things) that:
*the abortion will terminate the life of a whole, separate, unique, living human being;
*the pregnant woman has an existing relationship with the unborn human being and that the relationship enjoys protection under the United States Constitution;
*by having an abortion, her existing relationship and her existing constitutional rights with regards to that relationship will be terminated;
*a description of all known medical risks of the procedure and statistically significant risk factors to which the pregnant woman would be subjected to, including: (i) depression and related psychological distress, and (ii) increased risk of suicide ideation and suicide.

The conservative side of me commends the direct and no-punches-pulled mentality of this law. I can respect that they wont sugar-coat the situation; they wont act like it is easy or healthy. That is a good thing, in my opinion. And hopefully it will cause some women to rethink their decision, especially in the case of those doing it for selfish reasons.

On the other hand, it is a poorly written law with many things left unconsidered. For example, how can you acknowledge that the fetus is a living human being without acknowledging the process as murder? If you believe it is a living human being, and you decide to halt its living, then that is murder. The definition of it, in fact. So that leaves a huge loophole gaping open. Is this a gateway law to considering abortion as murder, or is this a confused halfway attempt?

Many people could argue that this is just a "mean law" to make women feel guilty about doing what they have "the right to do". I want to understand that point of view, but for me personally it would be like saying it was mean to put criminals in jail. An almost arguable point that comes down to this: they made a choice. Consequences must be paid.

I don't expect everyone to agree with me; far from it. I just want to spark debate and conversation. This is an issue that affects women and families everywhere in one way or another. What do you think?

Degrade with the power of a hand grenade

2008-06-20T09:10:00.000-07:00

This June the United States held the 'council president' position at the U.N. Council and we brought forth a powerful and devastating theme for debate: the use of sexual violence in war.

The council resolved unanimously that "sexual violence [is] a tactic of war to humiliate, dominate, instill fear in, disperse and/or forcibly relocate civilian members of a community or ethnic group."

Eve Ensler, I pray you were there for this. In discussing such war-torn regions as Yugoslavia, Darfur, Rwanda, Liberia and the Democratic Republic of the Congo, Maj. Gen. Patrick Cammaert theorized that "it has probably become more dangerous to be a woman than a soldier in an armed conflict".

The more surprising, and optimism-crushing, news is the rise in sexual abuse accusations against peace keepers and aide-workers. People who have been placed in the situation as care givers are taking advantage of the victims. It leaves you with a horrible feeling of "who can be trusted?"

This violence against women is devastating on immeasurable levels. According to Condoleezza Rice "we affirm that sexual violence profoundly affects not only the health and safety of women but the economic and social stability of their nations."

And while I am proud and encouraged that we are finally taking steps against this atrocity, I find myself wondering, "What took so long?"

Two Sides of One Coin: Side B (Babies)

2008-06-20T08:51:00.000-07:00

In Gloucester, Massachusetts "a pact [was] made by a group of teens to get pregnant and raise their babies together". None of these girls are over the age of 16. "...students were coming to the school clinic multiple times to get pregnancy tests, and 'seemed more upset when they weren't pregnant than when they were.' Some of the girls reacted to the news they were pregnant with high fives and plans for baby showers, Sullivan said. One of the fathers 'is a 24-year-old homeless guy,' Sullivan told the magazine.

Employees at the school categorized these girls as "girls who lack self-esteem and have a lack of love in their life." These girls, unlike those in Side A, are trying to become pregnant. They are hoping to bring someone into this world who will have no choice but to love them and depend on them. If only they understood just how dependant this person would be and just how much they still depend on their own parents.

These girls represent a large culture of young women who try to force love into their life by dangerous or ill advised means. Think of all of the poor girls who, as a result of sexual abuse, latch on to older men and seedy men or anyone who gives them the time of day. Imagine the underage prostitutes who think of their pimp with adoration because he is a man who feeds them, gives them a home and says he loves them. Think of the young women who grew up with parents who were absent, abusive, emotionally unavailable. We crave love and affection as humans and when we are denied it one place, we will simply find or create it elsewhere, however unhealthy.

What kind of message can we spread to these girls that will keep them from rushing into the harsh reality of adulthood? What can you do in your community?

Two Sides of One Coin: Side A (Abortion)

2008-06-20T07:25:00.000-07:00

Most stereotypes exist for a reason. Some seem to be maybe 1% true, while others hit the mark more often. One of the many stereotypes surrounding teenagers concerns their developing and rudimentary decision-making skills. I want to explore two ways this can majorly affect the health of young women (in the words of Young Jeezy) "sexually, mentally, physically, emotionally".

In London the abortion rate for young women has reached a record high. This past year (2007) there were a recorded 163 abortions by girls under the age of 14. This statistic is frightening, but not nearly as terrible as the statistic for girls under the age of 16: 4,376! That means that there were over 4,200 abortions for girls age 14 through 16!

Professors and professionals are churning out ideas to aide this new situation. They are aiming to prevent the pregnancy. I do not wholeheartedly agree with Julie Bentley's statement: "Younger women are making different choices about their lives and choosing abortion over motherhood. But education and contraceptive services will stop them becoming pregnant in the first place." Surely this is oversimplified! While I believe that our youth deserve and need a better sex education program, I do NOT think that we can lie to ourselves and them by suggesting that know-how and a pill will keep them completely from harm. We, as adults, need to be teaching them about consequences, about chances and about "fairness". If a teenager read the statement "education and contraceptives WILL stop you from becoming pregnant" they would be wholly misinformed. Most birth control has a success rate of 99%, which of course means that 1% of the time it is unsuccessful. That doesn't sound like much, it really doesn't, but that is one time out of 100 that someone gets an unpleasant surprise.

We need to teach our youth about the consequences of their actions. We need to be truly honest, even blunt, to get the point across. Too often people of all ages view life with the "it could never happen to me" lens on, and it is truly dangerous. They need to understand cause and effect: pregnancy is a possible effect of sex. Abortion is a possible effect of pregnancy. But how many teenagers have thought ahead to the possibles effect of abortion? On their body? On their spirit? On their friends? On their family?

America's Next Top Model Has Shape!

2008-05-20T13:43:00.001-07:00

FINALLY!

Tyra has been chomping at the bit to find a "plus-sized" model that could take home the gold, and she found her. Whitney was named America's Next Top Model for cycle 10!

This girl may be full-figured in the modeling world, but in the real world she is a gorgeous girl with a feminine shape. Curves used to be desirable in a woman and I am loving the return of the trend. Despite popular computer mottos of "You can never be too thin or too powerful" (blech) the pendulum is starting to swing back over to the juicy beauties of yesteryear!

Whitney, and the Plus Sized of ANTM

2008-05-06T12:03:00.001-07:00

I have been cheering for Whitney since the beginning; not only because she is the "plus size" girl, but also because she is good at it and has fun! I say "plus size" in quotes because by real world standards she isn't very big. One thing I have come to notice is the difference in that definition. In the fashion world I would be overweight, or at least plus sized. I can handle that; being confident in my own beauty is a blessing and an honor I do not need the fashion industry to validate. However, I do love when they make 'exceptions' like those frequently made on America's next Top Model. It gives me a little faith in humanity and the ever-swinging pendulum of beauty standards.

Whitney has made it to the top four girls, and I am ecstatic! It makes the show that much more suspenseful for me. I believe she has made it farther than any other plus sized model on ANTM. I have only watched devoutly for the past three cycles, but I have seen episodes from almost all cycles. I want to dedicate this success to some other "big girls" and celebrate their beauty:

Lauren, aka Grags

2008-05-02T06:18:00.001-07:00

We all have role models that we look up to, whether we openly acknowledge it or not. We generally look up to people who are farther along in the life experience department; people who have accomplished things we want, have found things we seek. More often than not it is someone older than us. Sometimes, though, if you are truly blessed you have inspirations and beauties of all ages around you.

My good friend Lauren is a prime example of a beautiful, strong, Christian woman. She has such conviction, not only in the deep spiritual sense, but also on a smaller scale: she gives herself incentives, like “I won’t eat this cookie until after I have cleaned my room”. How cute is that?! Cute as a button, that’s how cute!

This angel has worked in youth ministry for years now, finding a true calling to minister to and befriend teenagers. Lets be honest, not everyone has that much patience – do you? It takes quite a bit. She uses her gifts, not only as a minister but as an actress and amazing singer, to share her joy and her Lord with the world. She is lucky even – no, convicted enough – to go after the things God wants for her and be satisfied every day of her job. I can honestly say I don’t know what that feels like.

She has inspired me to do so much. I am making connections with some of our teenagers. I have set aside my pride (and shame) and used my life experiences to teach these girls, at least on a small scale. I look forward to the opportunity to continue in this. I pray that I can be half as inspiring and beautiful as Lauren and exude Christ’s light in this world of overwhelming darkness.

Plus, any delightful nerd who can proclaim that ‘Jesus is her Jedi master’ deserves a crown!

Onslaught

2008-04-01T09:52:00.000-07:00

Many of you have (hopefully) seen the amazing video Dove put out last year, "Evolution", where they show how fashion images are created. If not, click on the video bar to the right of my blog.
Dove has done it again. This newer video, "Onslaught", has quite a powerful message as well.

Miss Bimbo

2008-03-27T06:15:00.000-07:00

For every concerned doctor and terrified mother who watch young women destroy their bodies for popularity, there is someone happily, and not always intentionally, perpetuating the problem.

Welcome to the land of Miss Bimbo! "Become the most famous, beautiful, sought after bimbo across the Globe!"

"Find your own cool place to live. Find a fun job to pay for your needs and all the clothes a Bimbo could possibly want. Shop for the latest fashions and become the trendsetting bimbo in town! Become a socialite and skyrocket to the top of fame and popularity. Date that famous hottie you've had your eye on and show the Bimbo world the social starlet you are! Even resort to meds or plastic surgery. Stop at nothing to become the reigning bimbo!"

Stop at nothing. Even resort to meds or plastic surgery. STOP AT NOTHING!

This is the message that we teach young women in this country. The message in and of itself is not a bad one (hear me out). When we teach them to work towards their goals and dreams, we should impart the idea of 'Stop At Nothing'. They need to learn about hard work and persistence.

However, 'Stop At Nothing' is extreme thinking which can lead to promiscuous sex, adultery, drugs and other behaviors harmful to your psyche and body, especially in the entertainment field.

For this young generation, being "Famous" is the ultimate goal. Think about YouTube: Broadcast Yourself. How often do funny, horrifying or impressive videos wind up on major websites, television shows or even referenced in movies?

But let's talk more about this game. Let's talk about how the values it sets forth are permeating our youth. Dr. TimValko, a psychologist from Toledo, cites a comparison to a real world patient. "I just had a patient. One of her friends taught her how to vomit to lose weight so they would be attractive for other boys in her class. And she's in the fourth grade.” A nine year old with bulimia, and all for the attention of boys. This is the example set by this game.

The game's web promoter, Chris Evans, argues for the positive influences: “What about loving your bimbo? What about taking care of your bimbo? Sending it to university? The quality aspects of the game have been completely ignored.” My first big problem with this statement, for there are several, is the reference to the Bimbo as an "it". I realize that the game is intended to be compared to Tamagochi's, the hand-held electronic pet, but that is hardly an excuse for that mindset. Secondly, pretending that university is an expectation, even a possibility, is ridiculous seeing as how your Bimbo starts off with an IQ of 70. For those of you who are unaware, that is one point above mental retardation. "And you can't raise your I.Q. in the game," steams Valko.

The game has received quite a bit of attention from the medical profession. "This is as lethal as pro-anorexia websites," Dee Dawson, medical director at Rhodes Farm Clinic, which treats girls aged from eight to 18 who suffer eating disorders, told The Times. 'Players compete in beauty contests and send text messages to the site to earn currency in the game, which is then used to pay for lingerie, diet pills, breast enhancement and face lifts.'

One of the scary things about this phenomenon is that parents would be almost completely in the dark about it if it weren't for their phone bill. Although it is free to play, when the contestants run out of virtual dollars they have to send cell phone text messages costing $3 each or use PayPal to top up their accounts. This shows up as a cell phone charge which Daddy pays ( seems to fit into the theme of the game, doesn't it?)

This game is one of too many bricks in the wall between our youth and a healthy self-image. We have to work not only to tear down this wall, but to prevent more building.

Great Women Gone Missing

2008-03-12T10:45:00.000-07:00

One week after authorities found the body of Katoucha Niane, in the River Seine, Waris Dirie was reported missing. Seeing as these women are both involved in the political battle against FGM, suspicions are rising. Dirie has since been found, but the mystery behind her disappearance remains.

Both of these African-born women used to be models in the French fashion world. They have also both undergone female genital mutilation, FGM, and since written books describing their ordeals. Dirie's book, "Desert Flower", shocked the world as a best seller. Katoucha's story, "Katoucha, In My Flesh" was published very recently, and given it's practically-post-humus release it will likely make quite a splash.

The autopsy for Katoucha revealed no signs of foul-play, but her family holds their suspicions. Given their common connection it seems likely that many people will suspect the "coincidental" nature of these cases.

Whether it is a coincidence or on purpose, I believe there is a silver lining: this story will make it into many news sources, bringing awareness to an issue that has been too long in the dark. Hopefully enough light will be shed to make a difference, no matter how small.

FGM rages on in Sierra Leone

2008-03-05T06:23:00.000-08:00

This disturbing visual hails from Sierra Leone where some 800 women paraded and protested their right to female genital mutilation. These women, ironically 185 miles east of Freetown, danced and sang a warning to outside governments and groups against "any attempt to take away our traditional ritual".

Mamie Banya, a member of the Bondo Society, claimed, "Any organisation that has accepted funds from overseas donors to wage war against FGM is fighting a losing battle. Let donors keep their money, we will keep our culture."

The ritual is regarded as "harmless" while it "promotes marital fidelity". One demonstrator even stated that "it has made us women be responsible housewives to our husbands". Women were actually using the phrase "we love FGM" during their protest. They say that if the process was outlawed in their region, as it is in many others all over Africa, they "will become uncontrollable". It is a very important part of their culture that they hold dear.

That is hard for an American to handle, especially when we hear so many stories of women who experienced it as children; women who were scared, in great pain, forced against all will to be cut by unsanitary tools. According to the July 12th issue of Women's Policy, Inc., written in 1996 mind you, in areas in the Sudan where antibiotics are not available, it is estimated that one-third of the girls undergoing FGM will die.

Another piece of this puzzle often left unmentioned is HIV. Many women, especially those who experience infibulation, the most severe and damaging form, are left with no sexual options other than anal intercourse to please their husbands. This radically increases the odds of catching and spreading the virus.

If you believe in prayer, please say one for these women. Those that are suffering from the practice against their will as well as those who fight desperately to maintain it.

Katoucha Niane

2008-03-05T05:57:00.000-08:00

This Guinean-born model did many extraordinary things in her life. She experienced genital mutilation as a child. She ran away to Europe to be a model, where she became a muse for Yves Saint Lauren. She used her fame and status to speak out against FGM.

She was found dead in the Seine river this past week.

While some will specualte that this was an assasination for her efforts against female circumcision, the common theory is merely that she fell in the river while intoxicated. She lived in a houseboat, where her purse was found. The autopsy did not suggest foul play.

This beautiful, soulful woman experienced FGM at age nine. She later wrote a book, dedicated to her three children, that described the whole ordeal. "Katoucha, In My Flesh" was published last year.

Katoucha, like many women I deeply admire, used her pain, her suffering and her truth to help other women. Rather than hiding in pain and shame she acted out against a horrible crime. For that she deserved better than a meek ending in a watery grave. Let her story encourage you to share your pain with someone it can heal.

Fatima

2008-02-26T11:12:00.000-08:00

Yes, this woman is skinnier than my personal opinion of beauty. This body affords her the opportunity to be on "America's Next Top Model" (one of my not-always-guilty pleasures). And that platform affords her the opportunity to spread awareness of a horrifying practice throughout the nation.
Fatima was born in Somalia, where she spent the majority of her life, up until the past seven years. When she was seven years old she was circumsized.
Female Genital Mutilation, or FGM, is extremely common in African and Middle Eastern countries, for different reasons. For some it is a rite of passage, for others a religious requirement. It is sometimes meant to prevent a woman from feeling sexual desire, therefore "protecting" her.
The process consists of the removal of the entire clitoris. Often the labia are sewn together as well.
Fatima wants to use this show as a platform to raise awareness of this horrible tradition. Girls of all young ages experience this, and the fatality rate is staggering. These procedures are often done amateurly, especially considering how many countries have now made it illegal. Even in England there is a huge subculture of this practice, given the rising percentage of Middle Eastern inhabitants.
I applaud Fatima for making her effort to change the world. Each of us has potential to do this; it is only a matter of trying.

Ciudad Juarez

2008-02-04T08:51:00.000-08:00

The headline that accompanied this picture reads as follows:
"A group of women wearing white dresses splashed in fake blood, proclaiming themselves Miss Juarez, Miss Atenco and Miss Michoacan in reference to places in Mexico where women have been raped or killed protest beside the stage where the Miss Universe's native dress fashion show was held in Mexico City, Sunday, May 20, 2007."
As you can tell, I am quite tardy in keeping with these events. This is especially true when you take into account that these horrendous rapes, kidnappings and murders started in 1993. Or at least that is when they started getting noticed.
There is no way of knowing for sure how many women have been kidnapped, humiliated, mutilated, raped and murdered on the soil of Juarez. And no one seems to be trying very hard to stop it. Well, that statement is too blanketted; no authority or government seems to be trying very hard. There are angels working day and night to protect these women. Esther Chavez Cano, for one, has made it her life's work to keep these women from danger and help them when it is too late. She founded Casa Amiga, a sort of safe house for these women. She is a Vagina Warrior and an angel.
There are many theories surrounding these crimes, but there is one at the fore-front: many believe that the attackers are sex-offenders from El Paso. Apparently the border between the two is laughably easy to cross; from American soil onto Mexican soil, at least. We are so busy "protecting our country from them", but we have given no thought to protecting them from us. Apparently El Paso has a very large population of sex offenders. Well, what better hunting ground for these men than an unpoliced desert of impoverished women who 'would not be missed' (from a legal and societal standpoint)? If there is any merit to this theory, and I fear there is quite a bit, than we need to take action. We need to set up serious perimeter protection. What police do exist in this region are so under paid that bribery is common, understood and accepted. This region is also a huge market for drug trafficking, bringing in more bribe money, more violent characters and fewer acting police.
Ask yourself, what can I do for these women? The easiest, and perhaps the best, is prayer. The next easiest, in my opinion, is spreading awareness. Obviously, donating your time and your money would be a big help. Just think, you could change someone's life today. Hell, you could save someone's life today!
Eve Ensler, of course, has commune with these women. She introduced me to a whole world of hurt that I could learn to heal. If you are interested in donating, her website is a great place to start. You can also go to the Casa Amiga website.

"V" to the Tenth

2008-01-14T07:02:00.000-08:00

"Where I Want to Be"

Every year, mainly in the months of February and March, colleges, communities and companies perform 'The Vagina Monologues' all across our nation in a larger event called "V-Day". These groups use the show as a means to raise funds to stop violence against women, on everything from a local to an international scale. This is the tenth anniversary for this event, and Eve Ensler herself is throwing the biggest party.

In the original article from the New Orleans Times-Picayune, one reads that New Orleans will be home to "The Big V-Easy", a weekend long soiree to celebrate women and to honor the struggles and victories of Katrina warriors. While this is all quite serious business, many aspects will be the mood light and silly. For example, the Superdome will be turned into a giant vagina. That's right, the Supergina. Eve's sense of fun and humor are part of what has made her project so contagious and world-changing.

Eve's star-studded performance will include Salma Hayek, Oprah Winfrey, Jane Fonda, Jennifer Hudson, Glenn Close, Julia Stiles, Ashley Judd, Marisa Tomei, Calpernia Addams, Rosario Dawson, Kerry Washington, Ellen DeGeneres, and musicians Joss Stone, Common, Eve, and Charmaine Neville. A few of these women have shown up in this very blog before for their beauty and bravery.

I would give quite a bit to be able to attend this event. Some of my fellow Vagina Warriors and I were hoping to make a road trip out of it. As it turns out, I will be unable to go but for happy reasons; I myself will be in a production of 'The Vagina Monologues' in my hometown. Of all of the reasons I could come up with, this is the best.

I hope you are as inspired by the work these women do as I am. I hope you get involved. Even if all you do is go to see a production of it, you have helped to spread awareness. To find an event near you, follow this link.

Raising Gold Diggers

2007-12-18T07:39:00.000-08:00

As sad as it may seem, this is not the first time I have been offended by Wal-Mart's selection of little girl clothing.

These panties were sold in children's size at Wal-Mart. They are Christmas themed...apparently. The front states, "Who needs credit cards..." and the back reads, "When you have Santa..." That is almost a cute idea if it were not on the crotch of little girls' panties! We wonder why our children are so spoiled, why they are so sexualized, why they "grow up so fast". How can anyone not see the consequences of these actions? The mentality you are teaching your daughter is to find a sugar daddy; spend someone else's money.

Now some will argue that it is supposed to be funny. Like I said, it has potential to be cute, but not on children's underwear! Also, consider how often children age 3 to 8 get subtle humor and sarcasm...

We have to be so careful what we show and teach our children. We should encourage them in many ways, but be aware of what you are encouraging.

One angry blogger wrote, "there's nothing quite like telling adolescent girls that they don't need to worry about finances since they have their very own moneypot between their legs". We must take an active role in shaping our children.

Why not turn this into a positive? Teach your daughters about spending and saving carefully and wisely, and then they still won't need credit cards (for a while at least), but for much better reasons. Use this lesson as something you can teach your daughter, even if you just teach her 'what NOT to do'.

Relief for the Girl from Qatif

2007-12-17T07:18:00.000-08:00

Thank God for squeaky wheels.
The king of Saudi Arabia has released The Girl From Qatif after several other nations expressed great distaste and concern for her emotional and mental well-being. He expressed that he did not doubt the judgement made, but was acting in the "interest of the people".
Further details on the story (that I did not have before) make the situation more clear. The woman (19 years old) had recently gotten married, so she met this man to retrieve a picture he had of her. In the mind of modesty she did not want another man to have a photograph of her. By being in the presence of a man who was not her relative, she broke a deep rooted law and had to be punished, EVEN THOUGH her encounter ended with her being raped by seven men.
I begged you all to pray and keep this poor girl in your minds. Many people, including our own president, made their displeasure known. Thanks to their words and actions, this girl has been released from prison.
We need to acknowledge the power of our actions. I am not assuming my action had any direct correlation to the president's actions. I am only saying that speaking up can and will make a difference. Take heart in that, and take a stand.
(original article)

Jennifer Love Hewitt

2007-12-04T09:09:00.000-08:00

These are some comments made by anonymous online abusers referring to this swimsuit picture:

“I guess success has gone to her head and she thinks it doesn’t matter how fat she gets now.”

“If you think flabby is sexy, then yes, she is still sexy. Firm is always better than flab.”

“She needs to stop wearing bikinis until she starts working out.”

“She should be embarrassed about how overweight she is. She needs to talk to Jessica Biel or Nadja Bjorlin about getting in shape.”

Ladies, I am not making this up. I copied those directly from the article where I found them. I couldn't believe my eyes.

If this body is a representation of "fat" (now considered a proverbial 'four letter word') to our society, than what are the rest of us supposed to do?

Hewitt, a beautiful, curvy young woman, is proud of her body. She always has been. She used to be very thin (and popular), and this is probably partly due to her breasts. She has always had the top half of a "fat girl". No one ever seemed to mind her massive mammories when she was squeezed into a tiny dress and almost falling out of the top. Funny how the eyes of society are so selective. Except that it isn't funny at all.

What sort of image and ideal do we set for ourselves? For our children? Do you realize, in America, how young girls start to abuse their own bodies in an effort to "perfect" them? You can see 6 year olds in yoga class talking about carbs, 8 year olds skipping meals and weighing themselves 3 times a day, girls getting breast implants for their sweet sixteen or earlier. How long can we allow this to go on?

Yes, there is a weight crisis in America. In fact, there are a few. As a country we are severely unhealthy and overweight. What about those who starve themselves and get lipo to go from a 0 to a 00? Who is talking about their weight crisis? I am, and I am sick of this false standard.

The sliver of silver on the outside of this dark cloud is this : The "Ghost Whisperer" star says she loves her body, and according to buzz there are folks out there that agree. Searches on "jennifer love hewitt sexy" jumped 41%, proving that every dude doesn't desire a size zero.

There is a movement beginning of men who don't want women they are afraid will break beneath them. For that, I am thankful.

In JLH's words, “To all the girls with butts, boobs, hips and a waist, put on a bikini – put it on and stay strong.”

The Girl from Qatif

2007-11-16T07:21:00.000-08:00

"A Saudi court sentenced a woman who had been gang raped to six months in jail and 200 lashes — more than doubling her initial penalty for being in the car of a man who was not a relative"

This is what we are dealing with in other parts of the world, people. As Americans it is so easy to only see our own world. America is very often portrayed as "individual" or as "only". We turn a blind eye and a closed heart on too many people in this world. Our sisters are suffering in immeasurable ways.

This woman got into a car with a male she went to high school with so that she could retrieve a picture. While in the car two other men got in. They drove to a location where this girl (19 years old) was raped by seven men.

She will spend six months in jail after being beaten within an inch of her life under direction of the court. It is illegal, under Saudi Arabia's interpretation of Islamic Sharia law, for a woman to accompany a man in public who is not related to her.

I do not mean to only show one side of this argument. The men were punished as well. The individuals will serve from 2 to 9 years in jail for their offense. I do not need to make a one sided argument to show the horror of this situation; it shines through even when you show both sides! This woman was brutalized and shamed by a group of men, and then received virtually the same treatment from the courts! They beat her and threw her in jail!

Women very often hide their rape and abuse because they feel shame and they fear it is their fault. This "justice system" is proving their fears true! It sends the message that it is the woman's fault because men cannot help themselves and she should have known not to provoke them.

The woman, known in the media as The Girl from Qatif, was represented by a lawyer who appealed the case, saying that the verdict was too lenient for the attackers and unjust for the victim. His license was revoked. This is what happens to those who are standing up for what is just! It can be so daunting and disheartening, but we must continue to pray and to donate and to fight!

Do a little research. See if you don't feel the fire under your butt to do something, anything. Your sisters are waiting for you.

Sara Blakely

2007-09-25T07:05:00.001-07:00

As I am in the process of finding the perfect wedding dress, I must say “Thank You” to the genius woman who invented Spanx undergarments!
Sara Blakely was just a normal woman with a normal problem that she turned into an extraordinary opportunity.
“Like so many women, I bought clothes that looked amazing in a magazine or on the hanger, but in reality magnified every panty line and imperfection — clothes that eventually made their way to the "maybe one day I'll be flawless" section of my closet where they remained unworn.”(original article)
Who hasn’t felt that way? If I sold everything in my “maybe one day I’ll be flawless” section, maybe I could pay for a dream wedding!! These magnificent undergarments can reshape and refine most of the areas women are self-conscious about. They do not necessarily intend to make you look skinny; they intend to make you look smooth. More often than not, it is the ‘bumpy’ nature of my physique that bothers me, not my actual size. I am not alone in that feeling.
As if her invention hasn’t sparked enough good karma, “Sara is turning her attention to giving back by helping women globally with education and entrepreneurial support.”Sara has started the Sara Blakely Foundation which seeks to empower women. The Foundation finds young women with great potential and funds their education and goals. One of the biggest projects it is currently involved in is giving out scholarships for CIDA, the first free university in South Africa. These blessed women who receive the scholarships are given incredible opportunities that would have otherwise passed them by.
This Foundation has many incredible and maintainable goals, and I cannot wait to see what dreams she can achieve through this project.

“While many of our natural resources are being depleted, one is waiting to be unleashed… WOMEN!” – Sara Blakely

Outrage over Britney's Belly

2007-09-11T10:45:00.001-07:00

Despite her many, publicly stated faults, despite her sad descent into trashiness, despite her disappointing excuse for a comeback, Britney Spears is not fat.

The Internet was teeming this morning with blogs on Britney's belly. Critics everywhere are "disgusted" and "embarassed for her" because of her appearance.

Um, excuse me? I know plenty of people who would be happy to switch bodies with her (at least the outside; who can say what state her health is in). Especially given that she has had two children in the past few years, I think she is doing just fine.

Opinions at the Associated Press were fairly open minded:

"Was it fair? Did Spears, lest we forget a mother of two, deserve to be held up against the standard of her once fantastically toned abs, sculpted by sessions of 1,000 tummy crunches? Or was she asking for it by choosing that unforgiving black-sequined bikini?

"More profoundly, in an age where skinny models and skeletal actresses are under scrutiny for the message they're sending young girls, what does it say that we're excoriating a young woman for a little thickness in her middle?

"Talk of Spears' physique comes amid an increasingly critical focus on overly skinny actresses in Hollywood, who've largely replaced supermodels as the world's fashion plates. It's hard to pick up a celebrity magazine without a critical photo of, say, Angelina Jolie's birdlike arms. And curvy actresses are getting positive attention, from Oscar-winner Jennifer Hudson of "Dreamgirls" to Golden Globe-winner America Ferrara of TV's "Ugly Betty."

"In the fashion industry, there's been an effort to promote healthier-looking models. "Girls aren't looking as skinny this season as they did," said Suze Yalof Scwhartz, executive editor-at-large for Glamour Magazine. "There's food backstage. They're looking sexier." At Glamour, she noted, a model won't be featured "if she shows too much clavicle." "

I think britney should be satisfied with the way she looks. However her health, both physical and emotional, are in need of attention. Maybe if we stopped focusing on what "we the people" deem that she should look like, someone could give her the help she really needs. As long as the media and the consumers of America give constant focus to the disarray of her life, she has little hope.

I am asking you all to be better than that.

Moira Cameron

2007-09-06T10:52:00.000-07:00

This woman has broken down a major wall in patriarchal tradition. She is the first female Beefeater EVER in a history of over 500 years!

"Moira Cameron, 42, from Argyll became the first female Yeoman Warder in the guards' 522-year history after beating five men to win the coveted position to the famous ceremonial guard."

Cameron joined the army when she was 16 years old and served in the forces for 22 years, the required experienced to try for her post.

She has set an amazing example to girls and women everywhere that we can truly do whatever we set our minds to; even if there is a current rule excluding women, it can be broken! Thank you, Moira, for helping us break through the "weaker sex" stereotype. Good luck with the inevitable jokes that will come your way.

Playwright fights for Congolese women

2007-08-23T06:14:00.000-07:00

Eve Ensler is at it again, working endlessly to abolish violence against women. Especially sexual violence, as her efforts have turned to war-torn countries, mainly in Africa.
(For original article, click here)
"Eve Ensler has just returned from hell. That's how the author of "The Vagina Monologues" describes her trip to Congo, where thousands of women have been sexually attacked and mutilated in the African nation's civil war.
The 54-year-old playwright has joined with the United Nations in a campaign against what a U.N. expert called the worst violence against women in the world.
'In Congo, you're talking about a situation where Africans are hurting Africans, black people are hurting black people,' Ensler told The Associated Press in an interview from Italy. 'And it's harder to make people care. People say, 'Oh, it's just Africa.' And nobody is held accountable.'
She spent weeks at the Panzi Hospital in the city of Bukavu, in eastern Congo, where Dr. Denis Mukwege is helping to repair the broken bodies of war victims. The hospital sees about 3,500 women a year suffering fistula and other severe genital injuries.
A U.N. human rights expert said last month that the sexual atrocities in Congo's volatile province of South Kivu extend "far beyond rape" and include sexual slavery, forced incest and cannibalism.
From Geneva, Yakin Erturk called the situation the worst she had ever seen as the global body's special investigator for violence against women. She blamed Uganda-backed militias that occupy Congo's Ituri region, as well as the nation's armed forces and national police.
Erturk will report her findings in September to the U.N. Human Rights Council.
"How do I tell you of girls as young as 9 raped by gangs of soldiers, of women whose insides were blown apart by rifle blasts and whose bodies now leak uncontrollable streams of urine and feces?" Ensler asks in an article in the September issue of Glamour magazine.
The International Criminal Court in the Hague is now considering indictments in connection with the atrocities. The court's probe started in 2004, instigated by Congo's president, Joseph Kabila.
Ensler is asking people to write letters to Kabila, demanding that he take stronger action to stop the attacks. Hundreds of letters already have arrived at the United Nations, which is forwarding them to the African leader, Ensler said.
She is working to raise both awareness and funds for the women through the United Nations Action Against Sexual Violence in Conflict and through V-Day, a global movement she founded to stop violence against women and girls.
V-Day was inspired by the overwhelming audience response to "The Vagina Monologues," an award-winning play in which actors share anecdotes about their bodies that reveal heartbreaking and hilarious glimpses of their souls.
The V-Day movement has raised over $40 million in the past decade, funding thousands of community-based anti-violence programs and safe houses in Kenya, Egypt and Iraq, as well as the United States.
The money Ensler helps raise for Congo will go to Panzi hospital and to establish a safe haven called "City of Joy."
Her journey to Congo in May was inspired by a conversation she had with Mukwege last December in New York, where he spoke about his work — 'sewing up women's vaginas as fast as the mad militiamen are ripping them apart,' as Ensler describes it.
Their friendship 'began with my rusty French and his limited English,' she wrote. 'It began with the quiet anguish in his bloodshot eyes, eyes that seemed to me to be bleeding from the horrors he'd witnessed.'"

If anyone can read this without feeling rage, feeling helpless, feeling true sorrow, then go on with your life as it was. If you feel the need to donate your money and/or your time, check out the V-Day website for clues on how.

Women With Wings

2007-08-08T06:11:00.000-07:00

This amazing group of women has so many wonderful missions on their plate. Their main focus right now is to go to Zimbabwe and Botswana to "give back the voice" to the women there! This project builds such emphasis on the voice women have, and especially the voice we do not use. It is a matter of rebuilding confidence and spirit, re-establishing strength and will. These women in Africa need that desperately.

Nan and Lorri really need help for this dream to fly. They need encouragement, but right now their greatest need is money. You can make tax-deductable donations here if you would like.

For all of my Houstonians (and Abilenians) I have another method. Nan and I have had some communication concerning getting these women to Houston for a project building! Now, we would be responsible for raising the funds to get them here and do what they need to do, but we would also need to help them build this Africa fund.

If you have any good fundraising ideas, PLEASE leave them here in a comment. Also, if you are comfortable doing so, I ask you to pray for these missions and efforts. Together, we women need to utilize our strong voice and send these angels to Africa!

Plus Size Opportunities

2007-07-30T06:38:00.000-07:00

Hollywood Gains more than Weight!

"The ladies of "Hairspray" are a rarity in fat-phobic Hollywood, whose obsession with willowy women is so strong the idea of a corpulent heroine is almost unheard of." These harsh but true words are the opening for a wonderfully eye-opening article about the 'new' remake of Hairspray.

Honestly, when was the last time you saw a big girl save the day? Win the contest? Get the guy? Ever?

Well Hollywood is slowly changing it's image, and the commotion is being headed by the return of the movie musical. Remember the splash caused by buxom, bitchy and beautiful Effie White played by Jennifer Hudson? That plot is riddled with weight references. However, even that was a baby step; different cultures have different beauty ideals. I think that is incredible. But until we had a "good ol' fashioned American white chick" with plenty of jello to jiggle the test of our nation's preference could not be complete. Enter Nikki Blonsky. This beauty, who plays the lead role in Hairspray, is proud of her beauty and talent. She kicks serious 'A' at the local dance contest, and she knows she is hot stuff. She encourages her mother, who is so ashamed of her own weight she hasn't left the apartment in years, to embrace the world and herself. This movie screams, "Way to go, fat chicks!" in the best possible way. It teaches us not to judge simply by a look.

I applaud the return of the movie musical, and not only because I want to star in one. The more money we can throw at the box office, the clearer the message to producers: we want to see our selves, our neighbors, our friends on the screen, not just the pretty skinny girls you picked off the runway. We are women too, we are beautiful and we are talented.

And we will be represented in the world of the media.

Models

2007-07-19T06:49:00.000-07:00

Slow but steady steps are being taken to ensure the physical health of runway models and the emotional security of young girls everywhere.

While this article focuses on the fact that London is resisting this movement, it also highlights the countries who are really making an effort.

There are decrees being set about the limitations on fashion models, rules that should have been set down ages ago. They are trying to set a minimum age, namely because young girls are more succeptable to the pressure to lose weight in an unhealthy way. They believe that the younger the girl starts in this business the more likely she will develop an eating disorder.

These commitees are also enforcing rules concerning a minimum weight. In several fashion-focused countries designers have rejected models for being 'too skinny', and it it about time! They actually have regulations based on the BMI (Body Mass Index) which has more to do with the ratio of fat and lean muscle than just a number on a scale. It means they are finally trying to be more concerned with their health than just their appeal. Imagine what a great difference this will make for many girls?

I'm going to make a confession: I have, for quite some time, secretly longed to be a runway model. My body is far from perfect, but ladies I know how to do that walk! I have always kind of laughed to myself, however, at the possibility of it. I think I have a good mix between slender and curvy, but curves do not appeal to fashion designers this season, so why bother? Slowly the concern of health is sneaking up on the desire for "perfection", and it is going to change the social concept of ideal beauty. Look throughout history - the pendulum swings to both sides with time. There was a time in our history when being skinny and tanned meant that you were lower class, worked outside and could not afford food. Now it is revered as most high in the art of appeal!

Curvy ladies, our time will come again. It is already on its way!

Unpretty

2007-07-13T13:58:00.000-07:00

An older music video that makes a great point. It's cheesy, but they do a great job of covering a lot of ground. Any of it seem familiar?

Waris Dirie

2007-07-11T05:08:00.000-07:00

This Somali-born super-model is an example of exotic and breathtaking beauty. She is also an absolute pillar of strength. This woman now works for the United Nations as the Special Ambassador for the Elimination of Female Genital Mutilation, a topic she understands first-hand.
A lot of people are either unfamiliar with the idea of female genital mutilation, or they severely underestimate its existence. "Between 100 million and 140 million women have undergone genital mutilation worldwide, and 2 million girls are at risk each year." This practice is most common in African and Middle Eastern nations and cultures. An article I read this morning, however, made me aware of the rising number of cases in Britain.

Dirie puts her career and her privacy on the line every day for millions of children and young women across the world. She is able to draw upon her own story to encourage others who have had the procedure. The process she underwent was very often fatal; it took the lives of her sister and her cousins.

Dirie believes that the best thing we, as individuals, can do to stop this is to raise awareness. She said, "It’s got to be kept in the newspapers, it’s got to be talked about - and that’s the way people can help and to know what’s going on. Because mostly they don’t know what’s going on. Most of the world doesn’t know it’s going on, and it happens."
This strong, beautiful woman is a beacon, shining light on the dark things we wish we could ignore. I applaud her strength and her mission, and I hope she continues to make the world a better place.

Invisible Women

2007-07-10T12:06:00.000-07:00

So many of the women I have emphasized and analyzed are familiar faces; celebrities we see and read about practically every day. While I feel that it is necessary to do so, it is important that I do not neglect the Invisible Women, those who suffer away from constant watch.
I want to take a moment to give a little hope. I have become emotionally involved in the crisis in Darfur. I have tried to donate my money and my prayers to the efforts made there, and I am constantly amazed at the huge impact of a small donation. This article was featured in Oprah's magazine (and you know I love Oprah!) on how easily we can make big changes.

“Fueling Hope:
If your reaction to news of atrocities in Darfur, Sudan, is horror mixed with helplessness, it’s time to get involved. Many women living in refugee camps have no choice but to put themselves in the path of government-supported militiamen, Janjaweed, as they rape and slaughter their way across the region. “To fuel their traditional cooking fires, women spend as much as seven hours a day foraging for scarce wood, and while they’re out searching, they’re vulnerable to rape,” says Christina Galitsky, an energy analyst at the Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory in California. “The men can’t go instead because the Janjaweed kill them outright. And the women have become so desperate, they’re selling their food rations to buy wood.” Galitsky worked with her colleague, renowned scientist Ashok Gadgil, to develop a simple stove that reduces the amount of fuel consumed in cooking by up to 75%. There are 2.2 million refugees in Darfur who need about 300,000 stoves; for $30 you can donate one to a woman and help keep her and her family safe. Visit http://www.chfinternational.org/section/donate”

These women suffer violent and horrifying rape almost daily. They are physically and emotionally scarred repeatedly, and they do so to save the lives of their family. What better way to encourage another beautiful soul in this world than to save her from that merciless torture?

Mrs. Earth

2007-07-09T08:57:00.000-07:00

I found an interesting competition, and I wanted to inform people:

MRS. TEXAS EARTH BEAUTY PAGEANT SEEKS CONTESTANTS
Reply to: mrsearth2008@gmail.com
*** ATTENTION MARRIED WOMEN FROM THE GREAT STATE OF TEXAS ****
WE ARE CURRENTLY SEEKING CONTESTANTS TO COMPETE FOR THE TITLE OF MRS. TEXAS EARTH 2008 WHO WILL ADVANCE TO THE SUMMER 2008 INTERNATIONAL MRS. EARTH BEAUTY PAGEANT. DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO REPRESENT TEXAS AT MRS. EARTH?
The Mrs. Earth Pageant was created to celebrate the outstanding successes a women has achieved as a wife, mother, friend and community leader. Mrs. Earth will be the total package: beautiful, successful, confident and driven.
CONTESTANTS MUST BE AT LEAST 18 YEARS OF AGE, LEGALLY MARRIED AND A RESIDENT OF TEXAS. IF INTERESTED IN COMPETING, PLEASE CONTACT US VIA EMAIL. PLEASE INCLUDE YOUR NAME, MAILING ADDRESS, PHONE NUMBER, EMAIL ADDRESS AND 2 PHOTOGRAPHS.
We will forward you all the information you'll need to participate in the 2008 competition.

How fascinating that they are marketing it towards married women, and focusing not only on their physical beauty but on their successes as women. I think it is a great step forward in the pageant/competition world.

Bunnies against beatings...

2007-07-09T07:35:00.000-07:00

Really, it is You-Tube day...

This man makes an excellent point. I'm glad I found this clip because it illustrates that there are men fighting the same fight as women. Feminism does not set out to be anti-man, and I think this guy stands strong on an important issue. I especially like his references to the famous serial killers; not everyone knows this evidence from their testimony, and it is valuable.

Suffrage

2007-07-09T06:57:00.000-07:00

It seems to be You-Tube day...

This one might make you a little angry. Yes, this guy is definitely a jerk and a sexist. That part doesn't particularly surprise me. However, how sad is it that it works! It gives you a hint about our educational system. Also, maybe we should put a little more focus on women's studies at a younger age, especially at an all girls' school. Most of these girls think that suffrage is synonymous with suffering, so they are all for it. One girl got the voting reference, but she got it backwards.

What are we passing on to our future generations?

Women in Art

2007-07-09T06:51:00.000-07:00

This video is fascinating and beautiful. It moves from picture to picture a little too fast for me, but the image created is incredible. Watch it once through while watching the eyes the whole time.

Oprah Winfrey

2007-06-27T11:11:00.000-07:00

According to Forbes magazine, Oprah is the most powerful and influential person in our nation.

I'm not afraid to admit that I am often jealous of this woman. Can you imagine being able to make a living out of giving? Doesn't that just sound wonderful?

She has opened schools and programs in Africa, raised awareness for several issues at home and educated the world about a lot of things. She even graced the silver screen in movies like The Color Purple (a now-Broadway musical that she funds) and Beloved.

And not only is she a beautiful person as measured by her passions and accomplishments, she is in great physical shape as well! Amazing skin, gorgeous hair, fun and appropriate fashion; now, I'm sure it helps to have a make-up team, but either way...

I have recently learned of Oprah's O Girl, O Beautiful program. This site has some fascinating links, including interviews with famous, beautiful, successful women who have felt, and do feel, incomplete and insecure because of their bodies. Of the many options on this site, perhaps the best part is the contract. This is a literal contract for girls (and women) to print and sign, vowing to love themselves and embrace their personal beauty.

There are a million reasons to love this woman and her work. She has inspired me on many occasions and I hope she can do the same for you.

Encouragement

2007-06-21T08:01:00.000-07:00

I received this sweet poem from a great friend today, and it reminded me of why this mission is important. We need to recognize our own beauty without comparing or tearing down the beauty of other women. We are incredible beings as we stand alone and when we stand alongside our sisters. Let this be a reminder to encourage the beautiful women around you, including yourself.

A POEM ABOUT OUR GIRLFRIENDS
Someone will always be prettier.
Some will always be smarter.
Some of their houses will be bigger.
Some will drive a better car.
Their children will do better in school.
And their husband will fix more things around the house.
So let it go,
and love you and your circumstances.
Think about it!
The prettiest woman in the world can have hell in her heart.
And the most highly favored
woman on your job may be unable to have children.
And the richest woman you know,
she's got the car, the house, the clothes~~~~
might be lonely.
And the word says, "If I have not Love, I am nothing."
So, again, love you.
Love who you are.
Look in the mirror in the morning and smile and say,
"I am too blessed to be stressed and too anointed, to be disappointed!"
"Winners make things happen~~
Losers let things happen."
Be "blessed" ladies~~~~~
and pass this on to encourage another woman.
"To the world you might be one person,
but to one person you could be the world."

Fund Free Mammograms

2007-06-20T08:57:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite things about the female nature is the desire and skill to nuture and care. Obviously, some women are more or less skilled at this, but we all feel that draw.
What a nice feeling when you can do something for your fellow sister!
There is a website that makes it easier than ever. This takes five seconds, and costs no money. All you have to do is click on the "Fund free Mammograms" tab in the middle of the page -DONE! The site gets donations (that fund the mammograms for women who cannot afford them) from advertisers, so each click represents someone that has seen the ads. it is very simple. I have the site on my desktop, and every morning at work I open it, click, and I'm done.
Not only will you be doing something great for the world of women, but you will feel pretty darn good, too.

Sue Konicek

2007-06-19T07:19:00.000-07:00

You have probably never heard of Sue Konicek, and that is fine with her. She isn't in this business to be rich and famous.

She does it because she loves it. And I love her because she does it.

Konicek opened a theatre because "She likes to watch children’s self-esteem and skills grow as they learn and perform — on stage and behind the scenes." This article explains about how and why Konicek decided to change the world in her small venue.

She has sacrificed a lot in order to give this gift to her community. She jokes that she is "married to the theatre", but it isn't necessarily a joke. She spends all of her time there, dedicated to great art with great community outreach.

I think more of us should draw on our strength as women and go after our dreams. Sue did, and not only is she happy, but she brings happiness to others daily.

Women With Wings

2007-06-13T13:15:00.000-07:00

What a fascinating project I stumbled across!
These women have organized an art outreach that looks so incredible. Apparently they travel to your town, find a community of women who want to participate and build art towers based on the stories of the local women. Then they have an auction and sell the pieces. All of the art is inspired by the true and personal stories of everyday women. Doesn't that just sound neat?
I have made contact with their 'tour coordinator' and am hoping to bring them to Houston in the near future. For those of you living elsewhere, I strongly suggest researching this possibility.
Please go to their website and read about their mission - it may inspire you as it has for me.

http://www.womenwithwings.citymax.com/home.html

Jordin Sparks

2007-06-08T08:10:00.000-07:00

I have been meaning to write about this beautiful young Idol, but I am glad I waited until now. Sparks is incredibly beautiful, incredibly talented and very, very likable. She is also very lucky.

What she is not, however, is "a vision of unhealth".

Meme Roth would disagree. She is associated with the National Action Against Obesity, and she feels like Jordin Sparks is a horrible role model because her body encourages obesity in today's youth.

Now, I will not busy myself with calling this woman horrible names, 1) because hundreds of other bloggers have got that covered, and 2) I try to keep a positive vibe in this blog. But I do intend to disagree passionately with her specific statements.

The quote I had the most problem with states, “We have to stop with the 'baby fat,' 'curvy,' 'goddess' euphemisms and own this child health crisis." I am not going to disagree that we have a child obesity epidemic sweeping our nation. Every woman is beautiful, but it would be naive and dangerous for me to state that every woman is healthy! But to compare women and girls who are curvy and voluptuous with any kind of 'crisis' is the seed behind all of the negative self-images we carry along.

I support this woman's mission in general because she is striving to provide strong, healthy role models. Thumbs way up; I just think she ought to broaden her scope of 'healthy' to include muscular, tall women like Jordin Sparks. Have you seen this girl's father? Jordin is not genetically destined to be tiny!

The good news is that people everywhere - women and men alike - are up in arms over this, only proving that the notion of 'big = bad' is slowly but surely fading into a 'natural and individual are beautiful' mentality.

Suggestions

2007-06-07T07:18:00.000-07:00

There are so many inspirational beauties; women of power, charcter, talent and physical beauty. I would love to hear from those who read this blog who they would like to see honored. They could be political figures, movie stars, sports stars, religious figures, models - there are no limitations. They could be dead or alive.
Who inspires you?

My Point Exactly

2007-06-05T09:01:00.000-07:00

This video can be found on the Campaign for Real Beauty website. It is a little sad, but very true. It gives a little insight into the minds of young girls, the issues with which they suffer. It makes the heart-achingly true point that even the most beautiful women and girls do not understand and appreciate their own gifts.

Jennifer Hudson

2007-06-05T08:40:00.000-07:00

This songbird is one of only 15 actors (in 78 years of awards) to win an Academy Award for her debut film. She has a voice to incite a standing ovation in movie theaters across the country. She won our hearts on American Idol until she was haphazardly let go.

But the most remarkable things about Hudson are her beliefs. First of all, she has justified a nation of big-and-beautiful women, women with curves, women the way God intended them to be. She has the full-figured look in the bag. Do you realize she gained weight for "Dreamgirls"? They asked her to gain 20 lbs or so at the start of the filming. She has no intention of changing her body to please "popular culture", and thank goodness, 'pop culture' is just fine with that!

Secondly, this incredible woman is a out-in-the-open Christian. She grew up in the Baptist church and has been singing in gospel choirs for as long as she could. And I am always impressed when people have classy and pointed answers to controversial questions. So often the media (and other cynicists) will try to trip-up the religious types and stereotype them as elitist or judgemental, and sometimes they are right. This woman, however, stopped them dead in their tracks with this answer:

"In a recent interview, I was asked how I reconciled being a Christian with performing at events for my gay fans. I find it upsetting that some folks equate being a Christian with being intolerant of gay people. That may, unfortunately, be true for some, but it is not true for me. I have talked often of my love and support of the gay community. I have said again and again that it was the gay community that supported me long before and long after American Idol, and kept me working and motivated. It is the gay community that celebrated my voice and my size and my personality long before Dreamgirls. Yes, I was raised Baptist. Yes, I was taught that the Bible has certain views on homosexuality. The Bible also teaches us not to judge. It teaches us to love one another as God loves us all. I love my sister, my two best friends and my director dearly. They happen to be gay. So what? While some search for controversy, I hope that my friends and fans who know me, know where I stand."

This woman has so many levels and so far I like them all. She has my respect, for her talent and passion as well as her mission and faith.

Rosa Parks

2007-06-04T07:06:00.000-07:00

While a nation was at its feet, this woman ‘sat down’ for her rights.
Parks was an active member of the NAACP and was therefore very well aware of racial issues. I’m sure her stance to stay seated was entirely purposeful. She was a great model for non-violent protest. She didn’t start a fight, she didn’t yell or kick or scream. She simply stayed seated.
This woman was a major catalyst for the Segregation Movement. Approximately one year after her arrest Martin Luther King Jr. came onto the scene as a civil rights leader, and we all know where the story goes from there.
Parks was awarded the Congressional Gold Metal, Congress’ highest honor, in 1999. How incredible is that? She passed away in 2005 at the age of 92, at which point she was still as classy and sassy as ever. She represents an entire history of strong women who did what they believed to be necessary, and for this she deserves great respect.

Donna Hester

2007-06-01T07:41:00.001-07:00

If only every woman could have the drive and passion that this woman constantly exudes. She was my teacher, my boss, my mom-away-from-mom and my friend. To be fair, she is still my friend.

This picture of her with the ironing boards is from a short show she did based on an art series by Jill Maxwell. The piece was called Iron Apron Strings. Jill created several amazing pieces based on six women in the genealogy of Jesus, and she did so using household and stereotypically-female items like irons from all ages and ironing boards. Donna wrote a one-woman show to explore the lives of these same women. The whole experience was moving, humorous and beautiful.

Among the long list of her wonderful qualities, talent cannot be skipped over. Donna has performed in many plays on the ACU Theatre stage, and every one that I have seen has moved me or made me laugh. Sometimes both! She has great skill and joy for the calling of theatre.

Donna is not only an emotional inspiration and a spiritual foundation. She is also a gorgeous woman. Her skin and hair are incredible, and I have seen her husband of many years stare at her with love and desire (when he thought no one was looking).
I am so thankful for role models like Donna. She is someone to look up to and aspire to be in every way. Her age is regardless; her spirit is so alive and her joy so contagious. I pray that you all are blessed with someone like this in your lives.

Eve Ensler

2007-05-31T08:48:00.000-07:00

It is my proud pleasure to be from the same species as this woman. She embodies and empowers all things female. She was nominated by CNN as America's 'Best Feminist'. Whether or not you have heard her name, you have probably heard of her most famous works; "The Vagina Monologues".

This playwright and poet was devastated to hear a friend of hers' interpretation of her own body. She realized something had to be done to enhace communications between women and other women, but more importantly between women and their own bodies. We are strangers in our own land, disgusted and afraid.

As a result of her play, she began V-Day; an organization designed to increase the awareness of and cease violence against women worldwide. She has since become quite the activist fighting for women and their needs all over the world. She has since written "The Good Body"; a personal inspiration and mission for me. This play was the main catalyst for me to begin this website, this project. This time she explores the war we hold with our own bodies; not just a lack of understanding, but an active anger and fear towards. It all grows from the hatred she has for her own stomach, and it branches out to include stories from women of every age, size, shape and culture.

One reason I wanted to highlight this woman is for her particular kind of beauty. She is attractive in a physical sense, but certainly not "breathtaking" or "irresistable" by the worlds standards. It is her heart, her mind and her spirit that you cannot resist. She is an intellectual beauty, and inspirational beauty, not merely one of body.

Eve Ensler makes it her business to improve the quality of life for women everywhere, and for that we should be eternally grateful. If you yourself are interested in helping, her websites offer many solutions, from donating money to donating time.

Help this woman change the world before it falls into the hands of our daughters and granddaughters.

Dakota Fanning

2007-05-30T06:42:00.001-07:00

She has won MTV awards and Kid's Choice awards. She has been nominated for S.A.G. awards. And she is 13 years old!

This young woman has quite an impressive resume; do you realize she has worked with Tom Cruise, Mel Gibson, Reese Witherspoon, Helen Mirren, Kate Hudson, Joaquin Phoenix, Brittany Murphy, al Pacino and Sean Penn just to name a handful?

This precious, talented child has the look of a sweet angel, but she has tapped into her great acting abilities to pull off some weighty roles. Most recently she has been the subject of controversy over an independent film called Hounddog. In the film, Fanning portrays a little girl in 1950's Alabama who loves blues music. It gets her through the poverty and abuse in her life. There is a scene in the movie where she is raped by an older boy, and when audiences found out they went crazy. Groups were protesting that the film be shut down and that the director be sued for inflicting this experience on an actress who is so young. (Read more about the controversy here)

Fanning took an extremely mature stance on the whole project. "You have to prepare your children for things that happen in the world. Everything isn't rosy."

This beautiful, talented and intelligent individual deserves the immeasurable praise she has received for her craft, and I hope she is an inspiration to little girls everywhere.

Helen Mirren

2007-05-29T11:41:00.000-07:00

For every woman who has ever scoffed at an "anti aging" campaign, I present Helen Mirren. This beauty was born July 26, 1945 (get out your calculators, ladies) and has aged amazingly. She isn't flawless, not even close. There are deep set wrinkles around her mouth and eyes (most likely from laughing), and gravity had taken a slight toll on her body.

Who cares?

This woman was invited to meet the Queen of England, thanks to an incredible portrayal of her majesty. Mirren has been referred to as "the ultimate thinking-man's sex symbol", and rightfully so. Whether or not she is a fox (and she is), she possesses class, intelligence and talent. Not to mention a fierce wit.

I commend Dove Beauty products for their "Real Beauty" campaign, and specifically for their "Pro-Aging" campaign. Why try and fight the inevitable? Why not embrace it?

Plus, if you can pose nude at that age and still crack a smile, you deserve the world!

Keira Knightley

2007-05-29T06:08:00.001-07:00

This is the body of a woman who works hard. Thanks especially to movies like King Arthur (which, by the way, Guinevere kicks @$$), Knightley has adopted an extremely hardcore workout.

However, a body this good makes people suspicious. Knightley just recently ended a lawsuit against an English tabloid magazine that essentially blamed her for the death of an anorexic teenager. The tabloid posted super-skinny pics of Knightley (on the beach and such) and suggested that she had an eating disorder. The headline read: "If pictures like this one of Keira carried a health warning, my darling daughter might have lived."

Knightley was rightfully offended. She won the case and was awarded $6000 (3000 pounds). She doubled that money, adding her own $6000, and gave it to BEAT, a charity for people with eating and mental disorders.

Super-skinny isn't my look of choice (thank goodness, because it is not in my genetic code), but if you can pull it off, rock it. Every body is beautiful, in every shape and size.

Sara Ramirez

2007-05-25T07:43:00.000-07:00

A Broadway star. A television star. A true beauty and inspiration.

This gorgeous woman gives pride to voluptuous women everywhere. Not to mention hispanic women. This Latina Diva was born in Mazatlan, Sinaloa, Mexico in 1976.

She takes pride in her size. When asked about a certain scene from Grey's Anatomy, she responded:

"Nobody from the show said I was too heavy. Instead they wanted me to dance in my underwear."

Don't you wish we could all have that pride? That kind of self-appreciation should be more contagious. Pass some on today.

Personal Mission

2007-05-25T06:25:00.000-07:00

There are beautiful women that see an ugly woman in the mirror every day.
There are skinny girls starving themselves to get the attention of some boy.
There are older women trying every cream and procedure to remove the signs of age from their face.
We live in a society that demands perfection. Someone has decided on what is "normal" and "appropriate" and "acceptable" and women kill themselves every day to fit that mold.
I am here to tell you that every woman is beautiful.
This blog will explore the rampant negative self-image that weakens our stability. If people think fat is disgusting, I will show them just how voluptuous and natural "fat" can be. If people are afraid of wrinkles, I will show them how wise and beautiful their grandmothers are.
We must fight this fight together, every day and on every field.
In every woman there is beauty. And in every woman there is the power to inspire.